Ethan's Hike

I was feeling ambitious last week.  Ethan's 1st grade class was having a field trip to go up the canyon on a 1 1/4 mile hike.  No big deal, right?!  I offered to help and Mrs. K said i could bring Ruby and Spencer along for the ride.  It all started out pretty well, I had Spencer in the backpack and Ruby and Ethan were excited to be hiking.  After a little while Spencer started to fuss.  One of the other moms offered to hold him for me, which I refused!  I felt obligated to carry him myself since I was the one who brought him along.

Hiking along just great until Ethan gets tired.  He sat down on the trail and would go no further.  At this point I had to humble myself and let the other mom carry Spencer for me so I could carry Ethan.

Hiking along okay until Ruby gets tired.  Now one of the other moms on the field trip offers to carry Ruby and help her.

Hiking along, I am feeling really embarrassed now and I think I probably should have stayed home....then my lunch bag breaks.  Now the lady holding Ruby is also carrying my lunch in her backpack.

Seriously!!  I felt so stupid.  I had no power to change the situation, Ethan would not walk!  Stubborn boy.  In the meantime I was also supposed to be keeping track of another little boy in Ethan's life skills class.

By the end of the day I was so tired and embarrassed.  I was a little grouchy when we got home and I just felt overwhelmed.  I was really telling myself things like, "you are so stupid to think you could ever do something like that" and "you can't handle your own kids anywhere"  and "why do you even try" etc etc you get the idea right :)

That night I was saying my prayers and I was expressing my gratitude that we were safe on our hike, for the women who helped me, etc.  when I had a little flash of revelation come to my mind.  I pictured those women (whom I had never met before that day) carrying my children up a mountainside while I struggled up myself with Ethan on my back.  Then the insight and understanding that came to me was this:  you don't have to carry your children by yourself!  There are good people everywhere who are willing to help you.  I realized I don't even have to know them to let them lift me and my family.  I realized I don't need to feel embarrassed that my hands are full at times.  It is a hard lesson to learn sometimes.  

So I am feeling so blessed for all of the wonderful people in my life who carry us!